Practice and Play Dates

That's what we've been doing this week--having play dates and practicing. What are we practicing, you ask? Mommy is practicing leaving Jillian at daycare, because next week is the ever-dreaded return to work. Gulp. I can't believe this time at home with her is over, and I'm not sure where it went. If you would have asked me when she was 3 weeks old if I wanted to go to work, I honestly would have said yes. It was a rough time, and I was struggling with life as a new mom, trying to recover, and feeling cut off from the 'real world' quite suddenly. Now, it's a whole different ball game around here. I think my turning point was right at the 2 month mark. I suddenly decided that Jillian is really the only truly important work in my life, and I began to just have fun with her. She is spunky, challenging, cute as the dickens, and just plain adorable. My heart is breaking just thinking of leaving her next week. But--I agreed to try work and see how it goes, realizing that I have put a lot of time and energy into getting my career to the point it is at. There are several good things about my job situation that will make this transition a bit easier. First, I am only returning 3 days a week. Granted I am still holding a 75% appointment, so those three days will be long days, but Jilly and I will still have every Monday and Friday together. Second, my job has a great deal of flexibility. I can do a large portion of my work from home if needed. Third, I have control over my schedule for the most part. So it is not the end of the world if I don't get into the office until a bit later than normal or have to leave early on occasion. I keep reminding myself of these three points, in hopes that I will feel more at ease. But alas, I do not....
So in preparation for this transition I took Jillian to daycare twice this week. Yesterday, I dropped her off for 1 1/2 hours while I just went down the street to a coffee shop and wrote in her baby book. I told myself I had no reason to cry, it was only a short outing, but as soon as I took her out of her car seat to hand her over the tears began to fall. She did just fine, so they say, and was 'asleep' when I arrived. She really wasn't asleep, she was crying in the crib after being asleep less than 5 minutes. I warned them that she's not so good at naps :) Today I took her back and left her for about 3 hours while I went to get my hair cut and highlighted. I came back to another good report, and on arrival, she was wide awake lying in the boppy pillow with a rattle in her hand just looking around. She had apparently eaten a bottle, enjoyed watching the other babies, and did sleep for 20 minutes in the swing. I did not cry today, but am certain that come Tuesday morning, there will be a great deal of waterworks. There's a lump in my throat just thinking about it. It's one thing to leave her for a few hours while I get a break to do necessary things; it's another to leave her all day and have to go use my brain. I have my role as a 'worker' figured out, and am just starting to get my role as 'mommy' under control...I have no idea how I will handle the merging of the two. Fair warning, Matt--life could be interesting next week :)
Now let's get on to the fun stuff--play dates!
Jillian and I have been quite social this week. On Monday, we went over to Sean and Myla's for a date with the moms and kids of our gourmet club. I did not happen to have my camera with me, so I did not get a shot of the most adorable sight--Jillian and Sean really checking each other out. It was so cute. They smiled at each other and Sean even reached out and touched her--it happened to be her hand so it looked like they were holding hands. They don't know it, but they've been betrothed since they were in utero :) (Which reminds me that another bonus about this daycare is that Sean is going there, too). Jillian was very well-behaved for this play date and was quite congenial. I was proud of her behavior.
Yesterday, we enjoyed a visit from Charie and Malea. Jillian and Malea slept most of the time, which allowed Charie and I time to eat lunch and chat with fewer interruptions. Once they were both awake, we held them across from each other, and had fun watching their expressions. Malea smiled at Jillian, and Jillian was pretty much fixated on the flower on Malea's shirt. It was mesmerizing to her. The date concluded with some pictures of the two of them on the couch. Jillian is still working on her hostess skills.....

She's not shy about crying in front of others...


She must not know it's not nice to appear bored when guests are over...


Her expression makes me laugh here--it's as though she's envious of Malea's cute outfit ;)


Finally, a decent shot of both little ladies!


Lastly, because it is cute, here she is sporting one of my very favorite outfits she's ever worn. This one is a Christmas gift courtesy of Grammy and Grandad. Her dad just made over her all night when he came home and saw her in it.